There are many signs around me that I am truely becoming a mother--
but before I expose my soul you must know how much I ADORE my daughter
I love her smile--I love being a part of her life--I love the fact that I alone can comfort
her like a mother can and when people talk about how bright and interactive she is--I love
that I had something to do with it--that I can already see something wonderful come out
of this new relationship--it gives me hope.
I will also confess that there are moments especially after a particullarly tough week of thrush
and a cold--I know a two month old with a cold--well that's a whole nother tirade. Anyway, I was out and about without my baby and as I turned my car onto the interstate I realized I didn't want to go home. I wanted to go anywhere do anything besides being trapped inside with a fussy two-month old. And this is where the growth part comes in--typically when I am in emotional duress my comfort mechanism is coffee, or shopping or a good book--but this week I discovered something just as soothing--power tools. I love Home Depot and I love to do projects--I knew that but as I hung a very neccesary set of shelves in my basement entry creating a much needed pantry space off my kitchen I found myself humming--I'm so excited and I just can't help it--no kidding. I was almost giddy--course I was finally getting my kitchen in order and even finding wedding presents I had "put away" in the move that I hadn't seen since. But you know what atleast home projects pay back in equity--so its a way to give back. I guess the point is even my coping mechanisms are growing up--instead of indulging myself with shoes--I indulged myself with shelves. . .Who knew?
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